	Bob Hostetler > Writing

Letter To Saddam

by Bob Hostetler

Dear Saddam Hussein,

We're not exactly pen pals, but I thought I'd write nonetheless to ask a few favors of you, in light of the possibility, perhaps imminent, of war between our countries. I know you're not overly concerned about your citizens, but I thought maybe, in your own interest, you might be persuaded to act more reasonably if I just…well…asked.

Since the 15 U.N. resolutions you currently defy demand that you, not the U.N. or the international community or anybody else, provide documentary proof of your nation's divestment of nuclear, chemical, and biological weaponry and technology, and since you haven't even come close, would you hurry up and do it? Please? In the interest of peace. It's not like you haven't been given plenty of chances.

While I'm at it, since apparently only the Bush administration (well, and the majority of the American people) seems to think you have anything to hide, how about letting weapons inspectors go wherever they want? Even without your security escorts? And without stalling them for hours at a time? I don't know if Mr. Blix, the U.N. chief of the whole inspection thingy, would like that or not, but I think a lot of people over here would.

You're probably aware, Mr. Hussein, that many prominent politicians in America (not to mention others in the rank-and-file) seem mystified by our president's seeming reluctance to (in the words of Senator John Kerry of Massachusetts, who wants the president's job) "do what Adlai Stevenson did on behalf of the administration, Kennedy administration, and sit in front of the Security Council and say, 'Here is the evidence.'" You know-they want photos, like President Kennedy had during the Cuban Missile Crisis. The kind you can put on a big easel or show on T.V. So, if you would be so kind, please take all the containers in which your chemical and biological agents are currently stored, and all the nuclear technology you've had months to hide, and place them somewhere in an open field-preferably labeled with big identifying signs-so our satellites can take pictures of them. Oh, yeah, and please tell your guys to stop shooting down the Predator drones and surveillance aircraft that are trying to take pictures of the buildings and other installations you've emptied out and scrubbed clean. That would be really cool.

You've also probably figured out that the Bush administration is holding back some intelligence about what you've really got hidden because they don't want to endanger their sources nor compromise information they expect to use to actually fight the war. Am I right? So, even though I know you've never before hesitated to torture and kill, if you would just promise-I mean, really, really promise-not to figure out how we found stuff out, not to hurt any tattlers, and not to make our soldiers sorry that we revealed all we knew, our government could help Americans better understand the administration's attitudes and actions.

Also, since many politicians and pundits in our nation are bothered that President Bush seems to want to attack you and your military upon no more provocation than highly classified intelligence reports, your decade of defiance, your sponsorship of terrorism, your torture of your own citizens, your history of invading your neighbors and using poison gas, and as Mona Charen has written, creating "an environmental catastrophe (the Kuwaiti oil well fires) out of pique," it would be ever so nice if you would write, fax, or email the full extent of your secret plans and evil ambitions against peoples both inside and outside your country. As soon as possible. People in this country are waiting anxiously for something specific like that.

Oh, yeah, and though I know you're not known for your integrity, I think it would be really helpful if you'd just be up front about the whole thing, and not only tell the world that you don't have any chemical or biological weapons, but promise also not to use them if we attack you. Because, you see, the same people around here who are upset because they're not convinced you have such weapons are also really scared that you might use them if we attack. I know that sounds nonsensical, but that's the way it is. I realize that may be what you're going for. But it's not very nice.

I know that's a lot to think about. And since you've been not disarming for more than a decade now, you can take a little time to think about this, too. But it would be so great if you'd do this stuff, because there seem to be some people in this country who are going to be really peeved unless you do. Anyway, it never hurts to ask, right?

Sincerely,
Bob Hostetler

This article appeared in the February 7, 2003 edition of the Hamilton Journal-News.

More articles by Bob Hostetler...